|Really, a visit to Brighton is a nice day out.|
|And it's got a fairground midway. On a dock!|
The reason? If you ask someone who lives in (or even near) Hove if they live in Brighton, they will inescapably reply, “Hove, actually.”
This puts me in mind of Troy, a city I lived close to in the States. Troy was, to put it politely, a bit of a dump. The people who lived there had the choice of being known as “Troylettes” or “Trojans” (this was hilarious in the States, as Trojans are the US equivalent of the UK Durex), so they seldom admitted living there, and responded to questions concerning the location of their abode with, “Oh, I live in Lansingburgh,” or “Sycaway, actually.”
(Necessary Aside: this was, of course, many years ago. My wife and I have visited Troy on our recent trips to the homeland and I am pleased to report that they have spiffed up their streets and their reputation. The city is currently clean and inviting, with a charming down town area filled with shops and cafes and an aluminum statue of the city's most famous export, “Uncle” Sam Wilson, the original “Uncle Sam.” So if you are ever in the area, do not hesitate to visit.)
|That's Uncle Sam. Yeah, he's from Troy.|
Worth is a small section of the much larger town of Crawley, which is a sprawling New Town, built after the war as a dumping ground for bombed out cockneys, at the expense of the tiny village it engulfed. It is not the most desirable of locations so people from Crawley generally identify themselves by their neighbourhood. My wife, for example, is from Crawley, well, Pound Hill, actually.
Now, nestled within Pound Hill, and the neighbouring neighbourhood of Maidenbower, is Worth. Worth is the area surrounding the Saxon-era church. It is a very desirable address even though it is not, I am told, a political entity; it is simply a loose collection of lanes lined with expensive and fetching houses wherein reside people whose burning desire is to NOT live in Pound Hill or Maidenbower or, heaven forbid, Crawley.
I have to admire these people, for they have taken the pretence of living somewhere that you actually do not live to a whole different level by “updating” the road signs on the streets where they live.
|How to upgrade your address:|
STEP 1: remove the official neighbourhood name from your road signs.
|STEP 2: Add the name of the neighbourhood you would like to live in|
(even if it is imaginary).
|STEP 3: Repeat as necessary.|
And I also bet the Troylettes are kicking themselves now for not having thought of it first.